5.21.2007

Gambling with humans, part II

The last time you saw your beleagured Canucks, Pyatt, Linden, Hansen, and Reid all lined up as right wingers. I know, it puts the fear of an angry god on a drunken bender into your soul doesn't it?

So netting a decent right winger wouldn't kill right? Let's roll the dice and gamble with humans again. Based on the salary they'll command alone, the following UFA RW's can be eliminated from the hunt:

Teemu Selanne - Burke's not letting him leave; he deserves his final years to be a Duck anyway. Unless the Jets suddenly reappear again.
Dainius Zubrus - Intriguing option for the Sedins, but not at $4 million.
Bill Guerin - I'd say just go to Phoenix but even Wayne may not want you.
Todd Bertuzzi - I'm not even addressing this.

Assuming Nonis I have one to two million to blow on the right side, then there are guys like:

Scott Hartnell - Teams will jump on him like a two dollar whore at a Duke lacrosse frat party. What, too soon?
Mike Johnson - Has decent numbers when in Phoenix a few seasons ago.
Mark Recchi - Will likely stay with the baby Pens anyway.
Scott Walker - It would be a nice homecoming for this sparkplug but has had injury problems.
Tony Amonte - No, but feel free to languish in cowtown for another year.
Owen Nolan - Whatever you're selling, we're not buying.
Peter Bondra - If it was JUST two years ago the name alone would sell me.
Anson Carter - When the Blue Jackets don't want you and the defending Cup champs bench you down the stretch, it's evidence that you've been crushed by your massive ego.

As for the rest of the sub one-million-dollar class:

Aaron Downey, Alexander Mogilny, Arron Asham, Ben Guite, Brad Tapper, Darren McCarty, Denis Hamel, Eric Meloche, Grant Marshall, Jason Ward, Jed Ortmeyer, Jeff Hoggan, Josh Langfeld, JP Vigier, Lee Goren, Mark Rycroft, Matthew Barnaby, Niko Dimitrakos, Pat Leahy, Petr Tenkrat, Radek Dvorak, Reed Low, Rob DiMaio, Ronald Petrovicky, Scott Parker, Shawn Thornton and Tom Kostopoulos.

That all said, this meager lad's opinion is:

UFA Right Wingers
Will break bank/move contracts for: Walker & Hartnell
Hold your breath and pray: Johnson
Go nuts, but don't expect much: Dvorak
Plan a project: Petrovicky & Dimitrakos. Technically Mogilny too as it would involve a hip transplant and a time machine.
Look fondly at Manitoba: Schultz, Grabner, Hansen and Brown.
Just get a warm body: Marshall, Ortmeyer, Asham or Cobra Commander (the latter gets bonus points if he uses motivational talk in the locker room between periods like, "I shall be waiting to reward your genius or have you beheaded for terminal stupidity! I have spoken.")

7 comments:

Zanstorm said...

Mogilny and Hartnell. Those are my picks. Strap some stipulations on Almo's contract and bawango! he plays his heart out!

Mike said...

You really think Vigneault wouldn't rip Almo a new one? I can't imagine his legs are up to snuff with what he's looking for. I do love the idea of a walker or hartnell making the squad. Not that a ton of goals would come from their sticks but just the style would be so refreshing.

Johan said...

how about Hartnell, Walker and Dvorak. All for 5 million?

Isabella said...

I'm not too keen on Mogilny. I want the revolving door to end when it comes to the twins and their wingers, so I think a young guy, maybe around the twins' age at the most, would be a better fit. A little consistency for them would be nice.

Over at Canucks.com, a poster writing under the name of jester@wraiths.org is highly keen on Weinhandl, who was a Sedin winger during the lock-out. Apparently they had amazing chemistry and are close in age. I'm not on the Weinhandl bandwagon, but it's still something to consider.

Mike said...

Johan - I think Hartnell alone could fetch three million and walker should get 1.5 to two so that would leave dvorak out. But, that said, I wouldn't mind a splurge of five million if it gets those two. Dvorak I'm on the fence...I would need to take a longer look at his numbers.

Isabella - I remember talk of Weinhandl during the Carter fiasco last year. He's on the Wild right? Or on their farm team, something like that? The problem with a new guy is basically the fear he doesn't skate well in the NHL with the twins and then the team is back at square one. But it's not a bad idea; if he's cheap, why not? As for Mogilny, I just don't see how it would happen. I seem to recall his last radio interview saying he didn't really miss playing since he's more family oriented now. So it's just a fun idea to throw around while we wait for the Senators to sweep the Ducks :)

(a guy can dream, no?)

Zanstorm said...

Mogilny may be done, yes. But he played well when he won the Cup with the Devils.

Zy said...

I completely and wholeheartedly support the efforts to regulate online gambling because I feel that all humans should have the right to gamble from the comfort of their own homes without government involvement.