A face only a mother can love. I think. I'll have to ask her.

Somewhere along the fine line that separates sane rational discussion and the inane ranting of a barely coherent madman yelling at you from a street corner about the apocalypse while wearing nothing but a traffic cone on his head...lies this dear old blog of mine.

This site isn't even a year old yet, but to say I've gone above and beyond my original intent of complaining about this team's inability to [insert topic here] on a nightly basis would be an understatement. I got a boost when I started seeing this site creep into blogrolls on other sites I've been reading for sometime; it got a big boost when the fine people at canucks.com allowed me to borrow their fan blog every now and then.

Now, following some other Canuck bloggers, yours truly will be on your TV at 6:00 PM PT tomorrow night during the sports component of the evening news. Heron Hanuman of CTV was kind enough to take an interest in my story and put a small piece together about the sad saga that is my life of being a diehard Canuck fan without having ever stepped foot in the city. And Whistler has been taunting me from afar for years now, but that’s neither here nor there…

I think you can watch online from this link and click on Tuesday; it should run at around 6:50 or so. If not, just go turn on your TV but hide the children (you’ll understand what the phrase “face for radio” really means). And hopefully a cat doesn’t get stuck in a tree somewhere and I get bumped. But many thanks to both Heron and CTV, it was great fun to put this all together with him and his team.

Sorry for interrupting the Ducks/Canucks stuff; feel free to watch wacky teenagers beat up a duck doll to get your hate back on for tomorrow night. Peace, out!

We Call It Rhinoplasty In My City

You've likely noticed I gave this site a much needed face lift in time for the second season. I'll be messing around with the sidebar content in the next few weeks, but feel free to let me know what you think in the comments.

Thanks to Alanah for spending some of her booze-filled Saturday helping me make this template play nicely with IE.

By Lucifer's Beard!

Utah tried to kill me, it really did. But after getting stuck in the state for a bit longer thanks to the NYC area deciding to have an ice situation over the weekend, I am back home, sore, sunburned and immediately bored by having to return to my normal routine. The fact people snowboard for a job is just not fair. Not one bit.

Anyway, I've utterly clueless about the hockey world in the past ten days. First, permit me to recap my stupid attempt to play Sylvia Browne and guess what lurks in the future.

- March 10 - 1 for 3. Although I was semi-right with the Chris Simon suspension. Kinda sorta but not really. Oh well, at least the fucker is gone for a bit.
- March 11 - 0 for 3. I was really close on the Avs/Wild one for what it's worth.
- March 12 - 0 for 3 again! Christ I suck. Is Saskin still around?
- March 13 - 0 for 2. But hey, I got the Canucks/Wild score right, just the wrong victor. Brownie points people, brownie points.
- March 14 - 1 for 2. I'm ignoring I got the score of the Flames game wrong, but the Avs still embarrassed them and, since I'm sucking completely at this guessing thing, I'm counting it.
- March 15 - 0 for 3. GRRRRRR. I am one goal off in each one! See? This is why I just drink at casinos and watch others gamble.
- March 16 - 1 for 1. Boo yeah bitches, 100%.
- March 17 - 0 for 2. Not even close on this one.

So, in total, I went 3 for 19 during the week. 6.3% accurate. Christ almighty, that should be the new tagline of this blog.

The lesson learned? Be vaguer next time.

Looking at the Canucks in the past week, it seems they’ve done their normal thing. Not blowing anyone out – save for those filthy car whores from Michigan – but doing what they do best: eeking out one goal victories and riding Luongo like a rented mule. Sucks to see the Wild keeping pace, but it’s a mammoth delight to see the Flames falling slowly out of it. C’mon Avs (shit, did I just say that?) you can catch them.

Once I sleep a bit and breath in the shitty New York air a bit more, I’ll be back to normal. In the meantime, the Canucks can beat the Preds tonight. I’m leaving it at that since I can’t predict anything accurately and want to embrace random vagueness like, you know, half of my elected officials prefer to do....